This is between me and my body

Hello Friends and Welcome back. This week's blog is one about the realization that I came to subsequent to a grueling Barre Class thanks to the wonderful app Groupon. First let me shout out the wonderful ladies at The Bar Method who have been more than patient with me as I try to remember that my current journey is between me and my body; no one else. So here I am wondering about life and its purpose and my current journey of amazing blessings and equally amazing disappointments. I have struggled lately to feel balanced and in sync with my chakras and spirituality these last few months. So I decide to venture out and try something new. I purchase a Groupon for five classes of barre fitness in Hermosa Beach. I feel pretty good about the purchase. I feel even better when I drive to the first class, amazing walking up the stairs, almost invincible during the stretches-wait for it- then comes the first set of exercises. I begin to feel weak; out of control, and infantile at best are the emotions raging through my mind and muscles as I work to keep up and not compare myself to the seemingly perfect ladies who appear to do this on a daily basis. Then Lacey, the instructor comes over, and tells me I'm rocking it. Then it hits me; this journey is between me and my body, no one else in the room or on the planet. Then every out of sort emotion begins running through my veins as I hone in on my feelings of imbalance while trying to use the bar for support to turn out knees, flex my feet and squat while squeezing my glutes.  It hits me, I have been competing with every celebrity, every friend, every sibling, every person on the planet who has in some way set some unrealistic expectation of some life experience in the last year. I have been racing the clock of others, listening to the ticks of other womens' biological workings and managing my emotions to the perceptions of others. I have been meeting unrealistic expectations that are not even mine. My journey is my journey as is my body, time, money and life. My journey is between me, myself and I; and these barre classes are between me and my body. I will move forward reminding myself that each experience is between me and my spirit and those with whom I share space and energy ongoing. Love of self is my goal beyond the superficial and I hope to share this walk, this journey with others who look for support through Jacob Joseph and Jabez Family Counseling and Professional Services Group.